I was only sitting

I'm not twenty anymore. This fact is never more apparent when I injure myself without ever doing anything. Like most people, I suffer from some sort of back issue. Mine has to do with heredity and a poor core. I also sit too long as an artist and writer. I can get lost in the worlds I create, and before I know it, I haven't moved in hours. I know. I know. I've heard all the stories about how this is a slow death, so I try to make a point of periodically getting up to stretch and treadmill a bit each day. But, like I said, I sometimes forget. Eventually, I plan to invest in one of those elevating desks where you can sit or stand by adjusting the height. This past week, I spent a great deal of time sitting. I had a website to revamp and covers for my books to redo. I've had all kinds of tech issues to deal with. Mercury is in retrocrud (yes, I do believe that, folks), so that made for more time in front of the computer. I thought there was something wrong with my computer battery because it wasn't holding a charge, so I moved it out to the dining room in order to charge it up, but this left me sitting on a hard chair all day versus my comfy office chair. I eventually stood up and felt it. The lower back twinge that told me I had been sitting too long. That was it; from there on out, I could barely move. And this is always when the dog poops on the floor, or the cat barfs on the carpet, and you are the only one home to clean it up. You get my pain, don't you? I have literally thrown my back out over sneezing. One of the funniest and most painful back issue stories was when I was potty training my son to use the big people's toilet. I didn't have a little step for him to climb up and sit, so I picked him up to plop him on the toilet, and my back gave out. I went down like a ton of bricks. I couldn't move at all. I had to convince him to go get mommy's phone. So, he running around naked as a jaybird, laughing his head off while I am pleading for him to get the phone (this was when we had a landline phone and I didn't have a cell on me constantly). Do you know what it's like giving directions to a two year old? Eventually, he did manage to find it, and I was rescued by my father, who had a key to the house. We got my son dressed, and called my local chiropractor, who made a house call. I was put in traction, and the event was logged into the long list of stupid injuries. Remind me to tell you about the time a frozen Thanksgiving turkey took my back out . Fun times. You wouldn't think that being an artist or writer could be a dangerous job, but yes, folks, I'm here to validate that you can injure yourself simply by sitting. Getting older doesn't help either.


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